just dont simply promise me about anything..

why everytime when i need u, u will not around?
i'm nearly fed up with this kinda situation.. everytime i need u to be with me, by my side, u will not around.. fated? if it is, i will have nothing to talk about it..
helpless.. u wont know that kinda feeling..
if u are not able to do that thing, just dont promise me. i dont want everytime after u promised me, but u cannot do it. it will just make me feel disappointed.it is not everytime that i am able to console myself by saying that u are really busy with ur stuffs..
just dont promise me anything beyond ur strength. u will only destroy my trust on u..
really very sad and disappointed.
u are busy recently.. i know that..
i shouldnt blame on u.. i know that..
just cant control myself only.. maybe after that i will be better..hopefully..
wanted to talk to u..but i'm not brave enough.. just can write down my feelings here.. but i know u wont be able to see it..
u know why? it is simply because, u are not really understand about me.. so how can i consider u as a member of my family? although i had never been considered u as my family member.. dont blame me, because u are not, from past, now and future..

u said u want to bring me along to attend the dinner with LJ.. please la?! if i go, everybody will know what's that mean, except u.. sigh.. why dont u just care a little bit about my feeling?! do u really know that ur mui is not good in english speaking?! i'll only talk nothing and sit alone there..dont u ever think about this?! i nearly get mad about this matter! sigh.. speechless..