haizz.. these few weeks busy with my stuffs..discussions..assignments.. i seem like had a lot of things to do but the thing is, i dont know what to do.. my brain is out of function..mayb i didnt get enough sleep. this tuesday, skip 2 classes.. the first class i skipped is because i wan to meet the supplier with my friend.. second class i skipped is because i wanted to register my course in beta level. our action had been noticed, and the lecturer cancelled off our attendance. i had made my friends in trouble. sorry, really vy sorry, i didnt know about this. teach u all becoming bad students. sorry about it.

drama, my friend and i had done a script of the drama.. they all read it and our script had chosen! should i feel happy? it's expected. they all just copy and paste, surely ours will be chosen. sigh.. havent start to practise yet.. hopefully, it will be done smoothly.i hope, i pray.. sincerely..

business management presentation.. i had think of an interesting way to present. but i have to work harder to practise more.. fainted.. jiamei! u have to teach me ar... i'm in a big trouble now..i trust in u.. lol.. i will work harder! let's keep our good reputation as "the best group" together!hope this time we can maintain our reputation..

the moral social work.. really vy sad.. we had email to the director.. but she hasnt reply us.. confused.. T_T hope i can do this social work within this week.. next few weeks will be vy busy..

that fella promised me wants to perform to me, finally he kept his promise and perform his "er hu" to me.. pretty good.. enjoyed in it.. i did not tell him that his performance was good. i know he knew himself. and he is boasted enough to know his ability..
he is the first guy that i had no idea on him! have u ever see a boy is whacking a gal?! he has no gentleman sense la!! next time i should fight back! he has a "pig hand" and "horse foot".. damn pain la! shit..
today that fella is sad. u know why? because his friends all are bullying him by saying he falls in love in me.. lol.. for me, it is really a small matter. coz in secondary school, we used to "talk rubbish".. so i have the antibody dy. cant blame on that fella la, he is from boy's school. never face this situation before. but i really super swt when he told me what is happening. ok, normally, in this kinda situation, i think the gal should be the one who feels sad rite? reputation spoilt, "market" no more etc. but now mine and his position had turn the other way round. god! sienzz..
always said dont want others misunderstand us. hey, stupiak! the actions u did, ALL also will make people misunderstand us la! haizz.. when comes to this thing, i always will feel that i'm dealing with a 3 years old boy. so "clean" in his mind.. dont know how to communicate with him.

i cant do anything. if not he will like a kid. _-_
whatever la.. just censor those things that i dont want to hear, dont want to see.. ur fault! sigh... sometimes i really feel like open ur brain, and see what's inside.. pek cek..

我同意..有男女的地方,就会有爱出现..因为男生和女生是互相吸引的..
爱情,对绝大多数的人来说,是不可缺少的东西..他们可以没有钱,可以不要面子,但是爱情绝不能没有..
很遗憾的,爱情对于我,次于家人与金钱..换句话说,它不是什么不可缺少的东西..
你可以说我现实..我不介意..
或许应该说我自私吧?还是太理智?一旦那一段已经被我认定是不可能的爱情,我会以最快的速度抽身而起..长痛不如短痛..
以往的我都是很理智的..为什么这一次的我会这么糊涂..每一步都是错的..明知道结局会是怎样的..
反常了..这不是个好的现象..
虽然知道解决的方法..可是..我真失败啊..
叹~再这样下去..会很痛苦的..何必,为了现在的快乐..让以后都活在痛苦中?
你是知道的..我也是知道..
为什么会给我遇到这种麻烦的事情?!为什么....

sigh.. super moody.. many assignments.. have to find group members.. luckily most of them are 6 ppl in one group.. business project needs 12 ppl in one group.. last couple days i was so scare and panic.. my heart almost cant afford it..
i felt so angry and disappointed.. i thought that "someone" should be join my group.. i thought he had promised me since last sem? although i didnt put so much expectation on him.. but he should know about my situation now isn't it? ok, fine.. he joint others.. when i got to know this news, i cant even control my feeling well.. straight away sign out msn.. off my phone.. sat on my chair doing nothing.. idle there.. for a very very long time.. somemore in that afternoon, i felt myself was neglected.. this is not a good situation for me.. i dont like that kinda feeling.. feel like telling somebody else about my feelings.. but nobody's there.. ok, fine..
but, luckily.. the day after that day, we have grouped.. suddenly felt that my feelings are balanced.. if not, i will get mad..
the most headache thing.. my english drama.. both of us were neglected, once again.. i was trying so hard to calm myself down..i hate ppl break their promise.. i hate to listen to "sorry" this word.. sigh.. but what to do? i'm not police so i cant catch anyone of them.. i'm not god so i cant make anyone of them die straight in front of me.. what i have to do is searching group members.. finally, we found two indian gals.. god bless me.. hope that the are not that kinda lazy ppl.. marks for this drama are high!! i dont want to lose marks.. i dont want blackies to join us.. really dont want.. arh!!!
actually, i wanted to be the group leader for business project.. but i think nobod will agree with me.. i scare myself cant handle it.. so i just kept quiet.. let fate to choose for us.. i'm not the group leader of course.. fated.. nothing much i can say.. so i decided to do the accounting group leader.. erm.. it's kinda easy job.. by the way, i have to do from the basic.. i have many sem to go through.. so it must have a chance for me to be the group leader.. ^^
sorry, jia mei.. i know u will feel headache while handling us this gang.. but we will do our best!! and help u whenever u ar in need..
and thank you.. lucky to have u in pm08.. if not i sure died over there.. everything also needs u to initiate it.. sorry about that.. one sem only!! the next sem we can be together with the rest of the gang~
everything will be alright.. will be ok.. dont feel so stress.. sigh..

i told u dy.. u dont believe it. now u see.. what's ur feeling now? sad? disappoint? frustrated? or feel like dying?
told u many many many times.. it had been a thousand times i told u, i remind u.. but at last? all are the same effect.. what for?
humans are not trustable! they are untrustable. how many times i need to remind u? keep trusting people.. keep giving people chances to hurt u.. then? heart break? is that vy meaningful
for u?
dont put so high expectation on people. people ma on meet ur expectations. so, dont give chances to urself to expect other people can do well.
ok, u will ask, how about his/her promises? i know promises really mean a lot to u.. i also knew that nobody cares about ur feelings.. but so what?! they dont bother or care u, that's their business. dont too mind about what are others thinking on u. please la? relax gal.. people who do not keep their promises on u, are those who u need not to care to. u know the reason..
it is not a big deal!alone ma alone lo.. i rather to have few besties..

haha.. now only i realised that, actually, guys in love will be very stupid. somehow, they will do something considered stupid by girls. moreover, i think that girls will be very kesian, if they met this kinda guys. stupid guys..sigh.. (thanks meimei for telling me this. ^^)
so, i am thinking that, if continue like that, dont know when is my that gorgor will get a girlfriend. pretty worry about it.
my gorgor? haizz.. sucks la. always do something ridiculuos. somemore without the notice of the girl. pity pity..everyday seems to be very smart, but when comes to this kinda problem, his reaction is just like a boy with his first love. feel shy somemore. i one time slap to let u fly! this called guy ar?! (haizz.. i feel like banging the wall..)
how i know he falls for the girl? i got my way to know it~
:P
just because that girl is my besties lo. i'm started to think that is it he wants me to be his mui just because of that girl. lol..hmm.. the possibility quite big. but so what? i got a "kind" and "scary" gorgor~ somemore can bully him.
haizz.. but i will feel sorry to him la if i never do anything for him. lol..
hmm.. tell that girl about his? that's a good idea. but dont know whether my gorgor will kill me later on or not. and the problem is, if that girl knows about this thing, will she dont want to talk to him forever? the possibility also quite high. i know her very well.
ermm.. then ask my gorgor to be confessed to her? omg.. dont do that. i will be crazy, not him. he will scold me for a couple of weeks. dont.. dont.. never do this.
errr.. then.. just let it be?
har.. dont want dont want. or.. be friends first? but i dont think that girl will go yum cha with us lo. later teased by her.. even worse.. then how?
haizz.. stupid la gorgor! just be confessed la! dont bother any other thing! u have to believe that the power of love is the strongest wat! so lame la u..
okok.. i know the reason. but u can create some miracles right? left one semester only. there is an oppoturnity for u, dont miss it! or else u go back ur hometown eat urself!
if u dare to scold me even once, u will know the impact. well, i assumed that u knew it.

that's why i said u lame! i said u lame then u are lame! no more excuses! make me worry for such a long time. u shouldn't let this thing happened. oh my god, my dark eyes circle..my eye bags.. getting worse..
yes, is ur fault. admit it~ (if u dont admit, i will whack u!)

just go on! be ur mui, i surely stand by ur side one.. need not to worry k?haha..

hey! why i am the one who are worried about this thing?! -.-
hng.. dont care already. i want to prepare for my final!! blek! >.<

怎么了..怎么我觉得今天的夜晚特别孤单..呵..就像此刻的我..既无助又无奈..
该开心还是伤心呢?开心?可为什么我的泪不会停止?好不容易找到的朋友..又要离我而去..真不甘啊..可又能怎样?除了无奈..还是无奈..
你应该感到幸运..我第一次为离去而流泪..竟然是为了你..了不起了哦?!可是你不会知道..我也不会笨到让你知道..免得你飞了上天还要我把你拉回来..
应该要开心的..还有一个学期..还有一个..不长亦不短..恨它太短,因为我们还没有制造许多美好的回忆..恨它太长,因为越是看见你,就会觉得自己会舍不得你..太舍不得的时候我会把你帮起来的哦!呵..
保持得到吗?我们的友谊..应该吧..希望以后跟你聊天你不会嫌我烦..还能摸摸你的头..还能听你像个大人似的教导我..还能听到你真心要我改掉坏毛病的唠叨..还能听到你为了我的好,不惜以威胁的方式来逼我..
我就像个长不大的小孩..虽然有时侯你比我表现得更像个孩子..可我就喜欢造反..在你还没来得及生气以前做个好孩子..让你哭笑不得..每次都说自己是个最好的听众..可是每次的听众都会是你..也只有你会有耐心听完我的长篇大论..还会加以分析..只有你会已真心话来和我交谈..该挑剔的时候,该分享的时候,该骂我的时候,该唠叨我的时候,该称赞我的时候..一切的一切..慢慢适应了有你的日子..慢慢觉得你做的事情是那么的理所当然,而我又是那么理所当然的接受着..
你走了以后..我该怎么办..
一些事情..我没说,并不代表我不懂..我不说,是因为你没说..你没说,是因为不想让我担心..所以..我不能再让你担心了..你要忙的东西已经够多了..不是吗?我们会留下美好的回忆..足够我们用一辈子来回忆..我们.. .. 会是好朋友的..虽然不是最好的..却已心满意足.. 再一次.. 很高兴认识你..
看吧..眼睛肿得跟合桃似的..怎么睡啊?!都是你啦!害我的..

唉..每次写部落格都会隔段很久的时间.. 对不起啦.. 因为我一想到要把自己所想的事情写出来就觉得别扭的说..而且啊..我的感觉都是"非笔墨能形容"的..为什么啊? 因为就算我的感觉已经多到满出来..还是不会表达到我所要的..(郁闷啊....)

认识了很多人..了解到许多的事情..发生了太多意想不到的情况..但还是很侥幸的渡过两个学期..不错不错..

我觉得呢..上天没有把我遗忘..真的很感谢..在我对人生..对友谊失望时..让我认识了那么多的朋友..我会珍惜..
曾经的一切让我失去了信任的勇气..常常把自己锁在自己的城墙内..形成自我保护的屏幕..把自己保护的好好的.. 活在只有自己的世界里..当我想再次打开自己的城门时,才发现自己已不能和陌生人沟通..一旦陌生人靠近,自己会很自然的以一副没有表情的脸示人..和陌生人交谈,身体会不自觉的颤抖..
很努力..很努力的让自己接近一些朋友..终于有了一些好转..因为我会对别人微笑了..其他人不知道..我是花了多大的努力..费了多少时间让自己跨出这一步..
会的..一切会好转的..对不对? ....