Today was a holiday in Malacca, first day of Ramadhan. I went back hometown with my bro and his girlfriend, supposedly to celebrate my dad's birthday, yesterday.

First day of Ghost Month, it is strongly not encouraged to have any type of celebration. Plus, my parents only arrived at home about 2am. So, ended up we didn't celebrate for my dad. Just a simply face-showing section. >.<"
Planned to celebrate today. But ended up was just a simply dinner.
I'm wondering. What is the purpose I went back my hometown? It's tiring after all.

Recently, I started to fed up with my life. Sigh. again, I'm having this feeling. So don't feel like living in this kinda life anymore. Hope I can just have my great escape. There are few promotions offered by AirAsia. Just feel like travelling, escaping from all the headache situations.
I started to be autism and anti-social. Facing computer all the while isn't a good thing. =.="
Someday, I will surely escape from this world, without anyone's notice. That should be a great thing I think.

I knew the situation, yes, I understand. It's just couldn't convince myself. I thought I had balanced myself. But in fact it didn't. After all I'm just so stingy and not generous enough. Sigh.. how immature I am.
I know, they thought it's unnecessary to text and ask me out for dinner as I was not in Malacca. If for me, I will just do the same thing as they did. But I just.. ... just feeling so upset when I didn't get informed by them. Gosh! What am I doing. I shouldn't be this. I know that, I understand that!! Just can't accept that.
I was trying so hard to convince myself, brainwashing myself. I'm getting mad. I tried not to care about it. Yet, it is just keep appearing in my mind and reminding me. *cry out loud*

One thing, I'm confused. Friends in need are friends indeed. Yet, I observed that my friends will look for me only when they need me. Between us, is it nothing but just benefits? I started to doubt.


~It is my second time, for not replying your message. Sorry, I just need some time to balance myself. Leave me alone~

It's me again. Today is my dad's birthday. Happy birthday to our Lion King~ ^^ Love you forever~

Today I went for blood donation. No joke, I love to donate blood. It's just simply because it can help to detox me. XD
Okay Okay. Blood donation is good overall. But, I hate the feeling of "fainting" and my world is "spinning" around. I had donated 350 c.c. Pretty good huh.. I still can feel my head so "heavy".
Slept very late all these weeks. Should have donate, or in other words, have to let go some of the unhealthy blood from my body. So that my body can produce new blood and refresh myself.
After donating blood, no doubt, brain will be lagging, can't really process well. My friend accidentally pour the milo given to my trousers. And the worst is that, both of us were lagging, only realized what was going round after 5 seconds. My jeans was wet. LOL! So lagging us~

I told you to donate blood today, you said you didn't see my message immediately, can't support us.
I told you my head is heavy and fainting, you asked me who else was donating.
I told you me and my friend 2 people only, you asked me to take care her.

For the very first time, I so don't feel like replying you, don't feel like bothering you, don't feel like caring anything about you.
Why you just can't get out of my mind.
Why will my emotion can only affected by you? I'm so disappointed on myself. I can't find the original me anymore. The real one.. It is just disappeared.


~If you could understand me~

Seriously, I have addicted to blog recently.
Nothing, just think that, blog is the best way to express my own things. ^^
Still considering that whether I have to change my blog into author-access-only blog.
I had read an article online, pretty short, but meaningful, fall in love with it~ Here is it~

1、我这么喜欢你，你喜欢我一下会死啊？ 
2、你不会做饭，给我一边呆着去，以后我来做给你吃！ 
3、这世上谁都没有资格喜欢你，除了我！ 
4、你怎么这么笨啊你，以后遇到什么事要站在我后面，知道不？ 
5、总有一天，你的名字会出现在我家的户口本上。 
6、你站在那别动，我飞奔过去！ 
7、你给我听着，我爱你～～记好了啊！ 
8、谁要把你从我身边抢走，除非从我尸体上踏过去！ 
9、全天下所有好东西都该属于我，包括你在内。 
10、你为我扫屋子，我为你去扫天下！ 
11、爱你是我的专利，看谁敢做非法的勾当？ 
12、你要的，只要我有就一定给你，你还在外面转什么呀，老实呆在我身边。 
13、听说现在结婚很便宜，走，咱们结婚去，我请你！ 
14、一辈子那么长，等你几年算什么？ 
15、我要亲手给你幸福，别人我不放心。 
16、你们谁也不准欺负她，只有我才可以！ 
17、你等着吧，总有一天你会是我儿子的妈妈！ 
18、有本事你照顾好自己，不然老老实实地让我来照顾。 
19、想你的时候，我一定要找得到你。 
20、我要给你幸福，谁都拦不住！ 
21、我都舍不得欺负的人，哪能让别人欺负？ 
22、喜欢我是走马克思主义正道，知道该怎么做了么？ 
23、什么时候想嫁人了就告诉我，我娶你！ 


Oh my goodness~ how can one not love this guy? If the guy says so.
For me, I definitely will.. ^^
Particularly fall in love with point 13. 
This made me recall something funny. My friends were all discussed about who will be the first one to marry among us. And no doubt, they all were pointed at me. Haha! Okay okay. I admit I always like to imagine and I'm the only one who always have the feelings of marrying. Marry to who? Seriously, I don't know. Just pop up a mind that wanted to get married. 
What they wouldn't know is that, usually, the one who expected to be the first one to get married, will not get married first. *do you all understand what I meant?*
Usually, the person who has the least expectation, will get married first. I'm waiting for that girl, among us, our gang. 
I always have the feelings of getting married, will just make me take many things into consideration. Ended up I considered a lot and let the chances flied away~
That's my way. I like to consider a lot of things, even though the relationship hasn't started yet. =.="
Yes, I'm this kinda people. I take marriage as a very important thing. Marriage should be forever, and not just a ridiculous thing for some kinda people. 
Marriage should be blissful. So I strongly disagree that some people said, Marriage is the grave of love. 
For me, marriage should be another stage of our life. As human, we will be going through many stages. One of the stages, of course, will be marriage.
I don't want my marriage will be ended up with a sad ending, thus I consider a lot. I can't cope with any playful relationship. NO WAY!






~Hold my heart with extra cares, as it is so fragile to be broken~
~Happy birthday ba, love you always~

People often say, "Monday Blue". It's undeniably, Monday isn't a good day for people to start their tasks and chores.
Same thing goes to me, myself. It is kinda sleepy day. As usual, slept late yesterday, chit chatting until late midnight and have to wake up early morning today. So I have to bear my own consequences. *yawn*
The missions I set for myself, was successfully maintained for one week. @.@"
Should have keep on track in order to accomplish my missions. Gotta restrict myself again. >.<"
You are always the main distraction for me to accomplish my missions. Yes, is you, no more deny. :p
You are the one who made me slept so late, so tell me, why shouldn't I blame on you? XD
Although it is Monday Blue today, I don't really feel that "blue".
I thought we can only chat online, via msn, via sms, for that long and nonstop. Yet, I didn't know that actually by face-to-face, we can chat for 2 hours more. crazy us. You made me recall back my dearest bestie, Jeramin~
Only two persons, but chat for such many topics.
So, the conclusion I get is -- You are really talkative! XD
That was an enjoyable conversation with you. I do hope that you will have the same thought with me. >.<" Although all the while I was talking nonsense. ^^"
There was one topic, one particular thing that you had said. It meant a lot to me, although for u, that's just having some kidding elements. I was touched. T,T
Thanks a lot.


~You are the one, and only one. ^^~

Today is not my day, again, I guess.

Today morning when I woke up that time, my stomach was pain. I knew, it was the sign of period. sigh. The pain was getting serious so I ate medicine immediately as today was also my MA2 midterm supp paper. I'm not going to miss it.

As usual, I got up and settled my own things while waiting for the medicine to respond. After I bath, the pain was getting worse. I couldn't bear with it and got up again to my bed.

-15 minutes over..-
The medicine still didn't react.
-30minutes over..-
I started to roll on my bed. TOO PAIN!!!
-45minutes over-
I started to scream here and there. I screamed for my brother's help. Unfortunately, that little pig couldn't hear me.
-1hour later..-
I called my brother, via phone. Yes, through phone. I had no choice as there was just 45 minutes before my exam and I haven't started to memorize yet!!!
My brother thought I ate something wrong and wanted to scold me. But soon after he saw my pale face, he knew what happened on me. It was too pain and I started to cry (hugging my little patrick). Before this, once I had my period pain, he will be the massager to help me to massage my legs and foot as his hands are much warmer. XD
Right after his hands massaged my foot, my pain relieved. =.=" *If I know it will not pain in just a short while, I should have called my brother earlier!*

Today's medicine was a little weird. It took long to react. Ish!! wasting my time for the stupid period pain. *down*

I finished memorizing all the important points within 20minutes. @.@"

When I walked to exam venue, I could feel that I was actually flying, not walking. My head is so dizzy.

Today's exam? sigh.. Erm.. it was not that bad. But I really don't feel like talking about exam.. ^^

Finally, I have to thank my brother for being a good massager. Because of I always period pain, my house's two gentlemen (daddy + brother) had already found out the way to relieve my pain. *LOLZ*

What if my brother goes to Penang for his work after this trimester, what should I do during my period pain? What my mommy answered is that, find a bf~ How easily she answered. =.="

Then I should list down in my requirement for bf already. Add one more -- willing to help to massage when I'm in period pain. ^^


~thanks my lovely brother, love ya always~

Okay, super duper "fine". It's just will appear something to annoy me while I have to sit for my stupid tests. It distracts me~!!

I trust my 6th sense. It's quite accurate. How deadly I wish I could believe you based on my logical thinking instead of the so-called "6th sense". But it's lost of control. I have the feeling that you are actually hiding some facts from me. If what I felt is true, trust me, our friendship will be going to an end. It's okay. I don't want to bother this and do not want to find out the truth. Ya, again, I'm being an ostrich. Guess that I'm still so stupid. Lolz..

I also wish that, I could meet my special one, who is willing to:-

-support me all the while

-advise me whenever is needed

-guide me when I'm lost

-understand me well

-pamper me all the while

-concern everything of mine

-share everything of mine

How hard am I to meet the one.. Lolz~ It's okay, fine. I will just wait. I know he will appear one day. Perhaps next year? Who knows.. =)

Save me from drowning in this kinda situation.

-case closed-

Last night, saw my friend's post. I was hurt. My concerns had been annoyed her. I just don't want to see any chance to be lost if she can find the one. Yet, she is hoping for some other person. Okay, I'm wrong. Sorry about that, my bad. Sigh. I just can't be too close with anyone. Or else, I will start to force other to follow my way if I think that way is suitable for them. I always forget that, not everyone suits the way that I thought it's suitable for them. The way maybe suits me, but doesn't mean that it will suit other people as well. I hate myself, always realized this theory after I did it.

Sorry, once again. The last time I will do this. Just hope that you won't miss the chance, cherish it before you regret.

-case closed-

~hug me, and tell me everything will be fine~

~I'm just a little bit too stress.~

Nothing much to elaborate, just as title.

~If my concerns had annoyed u, I'm so sorry about that. Sorry for being so busy-body~