18/9/2010 (Saturday) Windy day

Today's quote: 别人看好你，不是看好你会拿到很好的成绩，而是看好你会尽自己的力～

Now only I understand the hidden meaning when people say "我看好你" to me. A big thanks to you, once again. =) I had been motivated, from the conversation just now~ Just bear with me. I need some pressure to push myself to study. That's why I always make myself so stressful. You must be so pity me to put a lot of pressure on myself. Sorry, this is the one and only way to make myself study. Or else I will be whole day facing the computer and totally don't  have the study mood.

I knew my parents wouldn't want to see their daughter to be stress like this. What they said before that was just a little pressure on me. However, I somehow modified this pressure to be greater so that it can really push me. @.@" But the consequence is that I had made others thought that my parents are those parents who only look on their children's results but not efforts.

Sorry, that's my own way.

So, don't always think that I get bad result is all because of you. You didn't do anything wrong. You in fact help me a lot to reduce my stress. If you were not with me, I think I'm now having mentally problem and move to Tanjung Rambutan Hospital already. Thus, your existence meant a lot to me.

Everyone does hope that they can get flying colors in their results. This does not exclude me. I'm just one of them. Yet, the reason why I want to get good result is that I wish I can have a first class result before my graduation. So that my parents do not need to pay for my loan. Or, I do not have to bear the loan burden. Plus, this can directly reduce my dad's burden and soon he can have a travel with my mom. I knew they wanted to travel since long time ago.

Once again, money problem. People do think that I'm rich. Yet, nobody believes that I actually not as rich as what they thought. If before that, I still can admit. But not now. My dad is a retired businessman. My mom is a homemaker. The only income they have is from plantation. This in fact not much, when my dad still has to give pocket money to we 3 kids every month, pay interests of housing loan and etc. Even my relatives have the thought that my family is rich. Who will know our situation? sigh.. The only hope I wish is that I can use my salary to take care myself. At least my dad doesn't need to give me pocket money anymore and save those money. I might not be able to give some portion of my salary to my parents, but I hope I won't need to ask for money from them instead.

Yet, they wouldn't know what am I thinking. It's fine. I'm just get used to it.

Today woke up early purposely to eat breakfast with you before you drive a long way down to attend your cousin's wedding. Pity you~ Don't even have enough time to study but still forced to attend this wedding. XD

I will "guai guai" stay at home to study today. *wonder why am I so obedient recently~*

I realized that I can learn a lot of things just by chit chatting with you. And sometimes I have many wrong theories which always trapped myself into troubles. You always can rescue me just by adjusting my theories to a little more optimistic. ^^


~Lucky to have you~